You know what's wrong with Canada?

Dad: "You know what's wrong with Canada, Bill?"

Bill: "Ineffective decisionmaking-by-committee in both government and the private sector, inflated economic gains caused by a housing bubble, a weak dollar, the use of Zed instead of Zee, the Trans Pacific Partnership, Quebec..."

Dad: "No, no, no, none of that matters to real people. Canada's problem is it doesn't brand itself well."

Bill: "Canada is one of the most popular countries worldwide. The Canadian people get free run through most other modern states. Unlike you, we aren't looked down upon by more civilized countries. Our brand is untarnished."

Dad: "Yeah well... I do still have that Canadian flag lapel pin your Nana gave me in case I end up in Europe or something. INCOGNITO! But no that isn't what I mean. I mean when they have something good they rarely stand up and beat their chest and say 'Ca Na Da! Ca Na Da!'."

Bill: "Example?"

Dad: "What's the best show on TV right now?"

Bill: "Game of Thrones."

Dad: "Okay but what's the best show not on overpriced pay cable?"

Bill: "Sesame Street."

Dad: "Sorry, that was bought by HBO too."

Bill: "Damn, really? Ok what is it?"

Dad: "Orphan Black! It's on BBC America."

Woo Clone Club!

Bill: "So it's British? What does that have to do with Canada?"

Dad: "They only make you think it's British! It's actually COMPLETELY Canadian. The creators are Canadian. The actors, though they have flawless English accents, are mostly Canadian. It's filmed in Canada. Nowhere does it say it's Canadian. It's like they just made the show and said 'Here you go, England. We owe you this for... like... letting us exist and stuff. Thanks!'"

Bill: "Well we don't like to be too overbearing, unlike some countries. Besides that's just one show."

Dad: "It goes on! Do you know what my favorite TV show was when I was a kid?"

Bill: "Red Shoe Diaries."

Thumbs up to you too, Dave!
Inspirational Work!

Dad: "Well, that was later, but when I was little it was You Can't Do That on Television. And I had no idea it was Canadian. It even had Alanis Morrisette! Though at the time I thought she was a boy. I didn't know many Alanisii in the US and she had a really short haircut."

Ahh... green slime. A jagged little pill indeed.

Bill: "You aughta know."

Dad: "Aughta, but dinnae. There's also Red Green on PBS. A show I thought was about a good ol boy from possibly Minnesota or something fixing stuff with Duct tape. Turns out that's Canadian. And let's not forget everybody's favorite chill-out show How It's Made. It's totally Canadian. The Discovery Science channel pretty much shows that nonstop!"

Bill: "Counterpoint. There are a ton of shows that we wish Canada wouldn't take credit for. For instance, have you seen Canadian Idol? How about Project Runway Canada? Sesame Park nee Sesame Street Canada is a particularly atrocious entry. Louis the Francophone Otter? Really?"

Dad: "Yeah well those are just rehashes of other countries' shows. Their original stuff is better."

Bill: "Dad for every Orphan Black there's a Littlest Hobo. For every Corner Gas there's a Beachcombers."

Corner Gas's best moment.

Dad: "Corner Gas wasn't great."

Bill: "It had it's moments. The point is that if you make enough shows eventually one is going to be good. It's the law of averages. We can't just go cheering every show to come along. And if we wait till after the show is good to start cheering for it we'll just sound like Kansas City Royals fans."

Dad: "I've always cheered for the Royals! We're number 1! USA! USA!"

Bill: "I rest my case."